Lost within this portal of time…

As the wheel continues to turn, the Earth begins to shift, an awakening long-desired after this period of hibernation. I’ve been digitally M.I.A for quite some time now, a silence and stillness from another century encapsulated my being. Fueling my curiosity and desire for another time while pulling me further and further from the 21st century.

Like a misty fog creeping in through the valley, Samhain came and went, a conclusion to a busy and invigorating Autumnal event season. By that point, something halted within. The drive to continue was smothered by the internal cry for rest. I couldn’t rest yet… I still had my time-travel to the Viking Age as well as the chaos of the holiday season to push through. By the time I made it to Solstice/Yule, I was nearly crawling, breathless and completely drained. I just completed my most successful and busiest year in business. 

I finally allowed myself to rest. Something I don’t often allow, as I have been conditioned much like everyone else in today’s society to produce, produce, produce. The act of stepping away from all business-related tasks felt like a betrayal, but a necessity the soul was screaming for. 

The darker months, beginning at Samhain, are my annual dive into the shadows. I always find myself at this time sinking into a withdrawal period, a journey of solitude and internal reflection. Trips into the memory banks, both into the subconscious as well as the bottomless pits of digital storage; occupy much time, catapulting myself deeper into reflection, reevaluation and redirection. 

This year’s dive has taken me back to the beginning, in many ways.

Back to the beginning of my journey since the start of this business, where I started compared to where I am now.

Back to the beginning of my life journey, all of the experiences and memories that shaped my being. My time spent in college, an eager and nerdy art student with big dreams and great fear. My life as an art teacher, from the excited young first-year teacher to the old grumpy lady who slipped into the darkest depths of depression.

Back to the beginning of this house, the journey it has been on since we first called it home, back to its birth in the mid 19th-century.

Since I was on a restful period with business, I focused much of my energy to this house, a place I hold dear to this journey I am on. A place filled with memory, history, stories and hidden mysteries. On paper, it dates back to 1860. Further research into historical records indicated it may perhaps date even further back to 1820. Either way, the house is filled with an abundance of years that have passed since its construction. Many families; many transformations. Many stories that will never be known. 

This house has always been very special to me. From the very first moment my eyes opened and it appeared within my vision I knew deep down, ‘that is going to be my house someday.’ I knew it with an unshakeable knowing, for absolutely no reason at all. Others around me reminded me of my lunacy, and my ‘dreamer’ mentality.  Needless to say, a decade after first gaze, it is the place I call home. 

Decluttering & refreshing space have been heavy themes over the past few months. I’ve assigned myself the task of transforming the home, once again. 

Whether it’s the casual shifting of thrifted & vintage finds, the slightly-manic flipping-of-all-furniture flips, or a re-paint job screaming ‘new year, new me!” This time was none of those.

I decided a travel through time would be more preferred. I repainted all of the woodworking, trim, windows, doors. All of the white paint that was cherished at the turn of the 19th century is now shielded in a color much more authentic to this old farmhouse and its historical time period. 

A rich dark green..

That’s why I have been digitally M.I.A; My latest time-travel obsession is the Victorian Era, there’s no digital presence here!

I sit and ponder what life was like in this house, at its earliest years. The mid-late 1800s brought a revival of spiritualism. Folks were interested in esoteric and occult studies. Cartomancy, divination, astrology, scrying, mesmerism and mediumship had a surge of interest. I often think about the folks that lived in my home, were they spiritualists?

Egyptology became popularized following the discovery of the Rosetta Stone; the Victorians couldn’t get enough of Ancient Egypt!

I’ve been spiraling in this portal of time, unable to find any desire to return to 2026. I’m digging through rabbit holes of various topics, gaining knowledge and inspiration for my creations. The mind has been unlocked and flooded with ideas that I can’t ever seem to make enough time for. 

So how is time spent, here in the 19th century?

✨Mornings are always special, fireside coffee time with Luna, watching the birds out the window. I gaze out and reminisce of warmer days, and deeply desire their return. 

✨By night, I am strolling around dramatically with candle-light in my fuzzy robe and slippers. It’s the 1800s, of course I will utilize my candle-stick creations. I keep warm, dim lighting at all times, I flinch and duck for cover if the over-head lighting is turned on. 

✨I’ve been reading a newspaper from the 1800s. A spiritualist publication called ‘The Banner of Light.’ I find it intriguing to read articles from such revolutionary times.

✨Inspiration is found in books, many many books. That I pick up, begin to read, get sidetracked, then pick up a new book before I finish reading the other. Then I have a stack of books I become overwhelmed with, so I put them back on the shelf again to return to eventually. Another constant cycle I loop through. I have no clue what it feels like to pick up a book and read it from cover to cover.

✨A lot of time is spent huddled by the fire, sipping on some hot tea, attempting to complete all of the other business-tasks that don’t involve sinking my hands into some mud. I find myself too easily distracted by the view outside my window; the luminous reflection of the icy pond beyond the old walnut tree sends me deeper into states of reflection.  

✨Finding any task that doesn’t involve technology, hobbies that stimulate the fingers’ constant desire to move… such as knitting, for example. I love knitting blankets. 

✨Much of my musical palette as of late has consisted of Classical, Ancient melodies, Black Metal, Doom Metal and Folk. I haven’t listened to this much Classical music since my days in college. As an Art History Minor, much time was spent visiting museums and galleries for all of the lengthy research papers required. Classical music was the soundtrack to all of those late night writing sessions.

✨I’ve been sent deep into a portal traveling through Ancient Egypt, a place the soul revisits often, but seems to be lost within at the current moment. Perhaps it is my current entrapment in the Victorian era that my interest in Egyptology has sparked yet again. It has had a great influence on my work, a new collection I am excited to share and expand.

✨Healing my body. Once I started the business I fell out of touch with my daily yoga routine. After one too many self-inflicted injuries and healing periods I’ve finally returned to more consistency with moving my body. I have been in Physical Therapy for a neck injury from early last Spring, and finally am feeling relief after carrying tension for so long. I am starting to feel brand new!

✨I’ve been finally putting my old leather journals to use. My social media absence has encouraged me to jot my random unfiltered thoughts into a more aesthetically pleasing and more aligned place. 

✨I am still painting the house! I got much of the woodwork painted green, but there’s still more coats to do. The completion of this task will send me into the next step of having to choose a new color to next repaint all of the walls….

✨& finally I am back to clay-mode. This is the slowest I have ever created, but it was a very necessary pull-away from business to realign with the direction I am headed along this journey. I am looking forward to completing and sharing what I have been working on.

I feel as though this refreshened space has not only invigorated my inspiration, but took my soul on a journey back through time further than I was anticipating. I’ve sat in stillness, surrendered to solitude, gone deep within, shone a light on the shadows, found pieces of myself, released and recentered, and I am ready to move forward. 

Speaking of moving forward, I am looking forward to making more of an effort to pour more energy into my digital presence, as much as it is a complete misery for me to do so. Any technology-related task is never high on my to-do list. As you see, this soul doesn’t align with much of the 21st century… and prefers to remain twirling through time long, long ago.

I’ve neglected my blog for far too long, a piece of myself I long ago hoped to share through story-telling.  I have much to share about this journey; through business, through life, through time. I find it’s often too overwhelming to even know where to begin. Perhaps we are within a shift, the veil will lift, and all will flow like a river, trusting in the direction it is flowing.

What’s on the horizon ?

4/4/26 - Mystic Fair at Spirit Healer Wellness in Randolph NJ. Tarot readers, psychics, mediums, healers & vendors.

4/12/26 - Clinton’s Art in Bloom. A street festival in historic Clinton NJ celebrating the arts & small business community.

5/23/26 - Renfaire season begins!!

*More Information can be found on my homepage.